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Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Not For You...

I woke up one day and decided, by some stretch of the imagination, that I was going to run. I had never really run distances before, just on the treadmill here and there. Yep...I was going to do it.

So, I signed up for a Learn to Run clinic. I wasn't really sure what to expect and I was nervous to say the least.

The night of the first class, my leader takes me out to do 1 and 1's..run one minute, walk one minute. I am like, alllrightyyyy...I am on it! So I take off like a bat out of H-E-Double Hockey Sticks, leaving the leader behind to eat my dust. She is like, "Wait uppppp". I am doing great!

So ok..I got the first minute in, barely, then we are walking. Next run interval comes up....I start getting tired....have to stop before the timer goes off. This sucks!!! But I keep at it. I start running again and I am NOT feeling the love here. My head is starting to ache...like Fred Flintstone ache. But I keep on...1 and 1's...which really aren't. I have to walk more...I am not enjoying this. I obviously have pace issues. My head is gonna blow off my shoulders. I feel ill. I keep on.

The next round of running I stop...I cannot go any further. I am about to projectile vomit on some poor man's lawn. No one told me it wouldn't be a good idea to have Subway, with onions and peppers and Jalapenos before a run. Yeah...I am contemplating the Ugly Cry at this point.

We walk back to the Running Room, my fearless leader and I. I am feeling like lower than low. I gotta learn this thing. I have to do it right. I will perservere! I WILL survive.

Next week I was back for more punishment. But it was better, and I did it. Hank Spongepocket had nothing on my absorption at this point. I did my homework as any student who is willing to learn should. I was sucking in all the information I could.

That was April, 2009. I couldn't run for one minute. Today I can run almost 14k, I discovered one day this week. And I will run a 1/2 marathon this year too. It is my goal.

I don't know how I got to be a runner. I always looked at "those" people with awe and reverence. They were RUNNERS. They were ATHLETES. I was NOT.

Today I still find sometimes I forget I have become one of "those" people. I look in the mirror and I see a healthy, happy person who accomplished some big things looking back. I am not quite sure it is me...but I look again. Yep...I recognize her. Don't ask me to change...I like who I am and what my life stands for.

This change is me is for me....not for anyone else. I have a serenity and a driven will now when it comes to running, both fueling me on. I have some kind of strange reverie that comes over me when I am running and I see the stars in the sky and the leaves beneath my feet. I want to go further and do more and see what I am capable of. I never knew. All those years I never knew I had it in me. I know now.

1 comment:

  1. Boy can I ever relate to this Wendy! I started my Running Room LTR in a February of (I think 1998). FEBRUARY in Nova Scotia!!! What was I thinking???!!!! What you said, above, plus I was freezing cold, then too hot, AND I was at the end of the pack huffing and puffing with my lungs burning because I was 50lbs overweight. NASTY! It lasted 3 months until I fell running in a slush-storm in April that year. Fell full weight on my rt knee and (your brother-in-law)Pierre's sister Kathy (my "sister-by-choice)had to come get me at her neighbour's house where I had crawled, injured, on their doorstep. Orthopedic surgeon found degenerative osteoarthritis in the damaged knee and said "run no more." That's all I needed! From then on it was walking only...for years...After walking the Bluenose Half Marathon in 2010 I decided since I walk as fast as some people run, I will walk/run this year, and completely run it in 2012 when I'm 50. In the meantime I may totally run Vegas too (in Dec 2011 with you!) at the rate I'm going. I always wished I could get that "runner's high," wished I could get addicted, but the universe didn't align itself for that until recently. Exercise for me has always been a dreaded chore, required to keep me from being or getting too fat. For the first time I'm doing it for the psychological lift/confidence boost, and with fat-burn as a serendipitous side-effect. I never thought I'd be one of "them" either, those running people....If I can ANYONE can!

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